Saturday, Jan. 15, 2005
Whats Your Sign
Youngest daughter showed up again late yesterday, ostensibly to pick up more of her stuff but in fact with her hand out. She knows when I get paid and is here every single payday, without fail.
For a kid who was here to pick up more of her things, funny how she went with her sister back to the Valley (Phoenix area) and didn't take anything. She just left her dirty dishes, ate my food, and I paid to do more of her laundry. At least this time I made her go with me to help fold stuff, which cut the time to almost nothing.
After my girls left, I started going through my room, sorting things through, figuring out what to take and what to leave when I finally get the heck out of here. I actually packed up a few things. I have two new sets of towels and several new dishtowels, some I got for Christmas. They got packed away. I went through my dresser and my closet and pulled out a handful of things that are going to the Salvation Army or to a yard sale. I'd say arbitrarily "yard sale," but in reality I don't have enough stuff for a yard sale. I already got rid of my "fat" clothes and most of what I have now, I actually wear.
I've gone through my books, too, with the same idea. I have a bunch paperback romances I'll be donating, too. The laundromat has a shelf for them and a collection bin. They go for 25¢ a book, all donations going to the Lions Club to pay for eyewear for indigent families.
It'll probably take me two weekends to get everything cleaned out, but I'm going to pare it down to the things I really intend to keep. There are some nicknacks that I'd like to take because they were gifts and I absolutely love them, including things my kids made for me in school. You can never replace that kind of thing. I've lost too many of that kind of memories already. There's my grandmother's sewing machine and my mother's serger. So help me I will find a way to take those, or else I'll leave them with a family member where I know I can reclaim them later.
The closet situation is dismal, though. I really don't have anything appropriate for an interview. Gotta hit Dress Barn - they always have good deals and their quality is excellent. I should be able to get a decent suit for about $100, maybe less if they've got a sale going. I hate the idea of paying that much for clothes, particularly when money is tight, but have to look at it as an investment.
I also got word of a friend who's selling a pickup truck for $1500. I don't know if I can dredge up that much before he sells or not but if so, I think I'll do that if it runs well. If I have a pickup I can haul the things I really don't want to lose, even if I can't take absolutely everything. At the very least I'll be able to bring my bed, clothes and linens, aforementioned sewing machines, my computer, etc. I probably won't bother with my TV and VCR - they're cheap to replace and don't really travel well. My former mother-in-law wants to buy my dinette for what I consider a really reasonable price; and while I like it, it's again something that's easily replaced and something I know I will replace. I will be taking my stereo, though, for two reasons. One, it was a gift from a dear friend; and two, that's something I know I wouldn't replace if I left it behind.
I also have friends in OK City who invited me to stay a night or two at their home. That will be welcome, for a number of reasons. It's roughly the halfway point between here and Indy, for one thing; and friend's hubby is a retired mechanic. He said if I got there he'd go over any vehicle I had and make sure everything's in top shape. Since any vehicle I buy will unquestionably be old, that alone is a godsend.
There's a box on my bed that I'm going to slide beneath the bed. I still need to sort through my shoes. Some of 'em are going to the Salvation Army or yard sale, depending on which I ultimately do. (Come to think of it, given 00's size change she's got a LOT of clothes and this-n-that she'd love to sell. It would both make room in her EXTREMELY limited closet and also give her some cash. Best of all worlds!)
I have a pair of shoes I need to take to get new heels, though, if they're salvageable. I love them; they're a pair of Naturalizers I've had for about 3-1/2 years and they're comfortable as a pair of tennis shoes but they're black low-heeled pumps. How often does THAT happen? It's about $10-15 to get new heels. A new pair of shoes in that brand is about $60-70. And there's a local shop that does excellent work. I'd nearly forgotten about those shoes...
It's been worth going through things simply for the lost items that have turned up, including a pair of pillowcases hand-embroidered by my mother before she died - again, things that are truly irreplaceable. That's why a safe deposit box would be kind of useless to me. I can just imagine the look on a banker's face if I put in a pair of faded pillowcases for safe keeping.
I'm debating whether or not to use a new keepsake. My new stepmother gave a kind of unusual but nice gift to all of us who helped with the wedding. It's a locket that's a keychain, engraved with our respective name. I know she's the one who ordered it because while she got both capital L's in my name (it's that way on my birth certificate, not an affectation,) there's also a space that's not supposed to be there. I still love it. I don't want to use it right now because most of the keys I've got are keys associated with the radio station - mailbox, doors, etc. If and when I get my own vehicle, though, I'm thinking I'll probably use it. Then it'll be a matter of finding a couple of photos to put inside.
There's a whole lot of stuff here at the house that's got to go BACK to the radio station, too. A computer, for one thing. A mic, too, and a mixer board; some software; a book or two; and who knows what else. Heck, when I clear out everything work-related I'll have twice as much space in my bedroom as I do now!
All right. I've stalled long enough. Back to the grindstone for me, gotta get going or I'll never get done. I'm jazzed now; the move is finally really seeming real, even though I've got to postpone it for longer than I'd intended. But seeing all of this stuff cleaned up and cleared out is exciting.
I got another unusual fortune cookie today. This time I scanned it in just to prove my point:
Two fortunes for one, as you can see. I could see the fainter lettering behind, but couldn't read it until I finally scanned it in and blew it up. I don't know how well you can make it out, but it says, "All the effort you are making will ultimately pay off."
A very sweet friend of mine recently commented that things were about to change for me and that I would finally begin to see the financial rewards for my work that I haven't seen before. Long story behind that, but even if I weren't a believer in fate, all of the stupid little things like this are snowballing. I feel like the character Jim Carey played in Bruce Almighty when he was talking to God, asked for signs and a truck full of signs pulled in front of him. Maybe things aren't going in the way I think they should, nor changing as fast as I think I'd like them to change - but they are absolutely changing. I wonder sometimes how much we cheat ourselves by ignoring the little things that happen around us - and I've become increasingly aware of those things over time. I no longer dismiss them, particularly when they start numbering in the hundreds.
And BoXx9000, I hope and believe you're next. Start looking for the little things. And watch out for that truck pulling in front of you - it could be full of signs.
Before - After
In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )