Thursday, Jul. 28, 2005
Yes I Am Still Alive and Better Than Well
I figured if I didn't post in a day or so I'd start getting emails so I'll post at least a little today.
Yes, T arrived on schedule yesterday evening - technically a little ahead of schedule, in fact, as he was waiting when I arrived and I was actually earlier than we'd agreed to meet. This was the first time we'd met face-to-face, to answer a comment left by Wenchie and a couple of others just a few days ago.
But it didn't matter - the electricity from online and on the phone carried over without missing a beat. I know T's reading here, despite his assertation originally that he wouldn't - I pointed out it's kind of silly to impose any arbitrary restrictions, since he's now moved from just having an impact on my life to becoming a participant in it. If he doesn't know or learn much more than is entered here, then this diary isn't even really a consideration. I was really nervous about he'd react to me - despite all of the weight I've lost, I'm still not a small woman. He told me it didn't matter and I am nearly convinced.
T is nothing if not a charmer!
We met for dinner, talked, then I drove us to a nearby park, where we walked around the manmade lake, enjoying the perfect weather. I felt kind of bad, though - T was attacked by a couple of deadly willow trees at the park. You know how those trees are -- always sticking their branches into other people's business! I think he got whacked in the head by the darned things two or three times.
We're still in monsoon weather in Arizona; the heat dissipated pretty quickly in the early evening, there were enough clouds to keep the sunlight from being overpowering, and there was a nice cool breeze blowing through the area. Everyone we met along the way said hello - one of the bonuses of living in a small town. T commented more than once about how peaceful it is here - and I agree. It's one of many reasons I love living here, as opposed to Globe.
We ended up talking late - too late, really, considering how early I have to be at work and considering he had a 2-hour drive back to the Valley, give or take. But I'm glad - it was worth a little loss of sleep. T didn't complain so I hope he figures it was worth it, too.
Another thing was interesting, too; I watched T transform in much the same way I did when I moved here. The tension left his face gradually, throughout the night. I have no doubt he was as nervous as I was when we first met, though he hid it pretty darned well. I imagine some of the relaxation was simply deciding that I'm not an axe murderer. (What can I say? I hide it well.) But at the right time of the year, right time of the day, this place is heaven, too.
In all fairness to T, I should also point out that I did most of the talking. Hey, I'm female, born into a family of preachers (the class that can out-talk ANYONE) and a disc jockey. Talking is my forte. But I tried to let T get a word in edgewise, at least once in a while. There were a couple of times I even shut up for five whole seconds last night! That's gotta be some kind of a record.
All kidding aside, when I went in to work today I got compliments from several people. One of the guys asked me what I'd done - changed my hair? - but whatever it was I looked good. I didn't change anything, but I was sure as heck smiling all day.
Darn - my Norton's gotten corrupted - I'm guessing it's related to the crapola I downloaded a couple of weeks ago. It gave me an error message then telling me to re-install; this time I'm going to have to actually do it. Hopefully I didn't get the same sleazy POS virus that killed Michael's computer, though from what he told me it's doubtful.
Before - After
In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )