Friday, Aug. 19, 2005
Yes, this is my second entry of the day. I got off work on time, as scheduled. I also got my bangs trimmed. Everything else kind of went ka-plooey.
I have to re-revise my point of view on Pipeboy, 00's now-ex-boyfriend. 00 phoned me Tuesday and asked me to pick her up - from Globe - 160 miles out of my way. At that point Pipeboy had phoned to say she was irrational and had accused him of cheating on her, that she hadn't been taking her antidepressants for about eight months and so on. I drove down there thinking while she was obviously upset, she really hadn't sounded irrational to me on the phone. When I got there she decided she didn't want to leave after all; not because she'd made up with this man, but because she was afraid that if she ended up staying with me she'd end up sunk into an irreversable depression and could end up losing her son for good in the process.
Keeping in mind that I came thisclose to losing her to a suicide attempt a couple of years ago, I wasn't happy leaving her there but also didn't push for her to come with me, just left the option open. Besides which, she truly wasn't irrational, just upset, sad, and feeling trapped in an untenable situation. (Something I know from personal experience.)
I got another phone call from 00 a little while ago. Pipeboy's own mother turned him in to the police after discovering he'd been sleeping with an underage teen in his employ. (Pipeboy is 29 years old.) It's been going on for a while. 00 was in tears and doesn't know which way to turn. She knows she can't stay where she is; she has no income and can't get a job in Globe (also known as the outskirts of hell) because she's not related to anyone in power. (That town is so inbred it could be British royalty.) She doesn't have a vehicle, doesn't want to come here, and doesn't have a place to stay in the Phoenix area. I don't know what's next. I'm trying to figure something out but I'm barely functional myself after this week!
I'm waiting to hear back from my sister to see if 00 can stay with her; I'm also going to phone Youngest Son to see if he can help her get work where he works. I don't know if they have a nepotism rule and even if they don't, not sure it would be wise for them to work at the same location, particularly not with Youngest Son in the position of boss. But by the same token, they do get along well and it would help them both financially, and would get 00 into a much more stable situation, one without the additional complications of a "relationship."
Well at least I got a few weeks' reprieve before real life hit again.
Before - After
In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )