Radiogurl a la Carte

2003-12-05
Fright Night In Teenytown

Let me explain something about myself here. I don't really enjoy horror films, including the so-called 'slasher' movies that incorporate buckets of fake blood and even more bad acting. The high-class horror flicks are okay - but still not my thing.

Anyone who's ever lived with two teenaged girls will understand.

Horror movies are boring in comparison. The angst, the stupid decisions... DON'T go to the door and open it when there's a psycho killer (or a musician) outside, you moron!, the bad hair and worse wardrobe, the screaming, the all of that and more you can get from your daughters any time. Those are the AVERAGE days.

With teenagers, you also soon discover that there is a black hole in your house. You buy a new sweater - even if you're a dad - and it disappears and reappears at will. If you're lucky it reappears, anyway. There are shady characters hanging around at all hours, and more often than not there are red eyes. Glowing is optional but certainly possible.

The hysterics of some nubile young thing facing a masked figure with a knife? NOTHING compared to a teenaged girl facing the rigors of an hour without a telephone, stereo, or - the worst possible omission - makeup. Preferably mom's.

While in reality, teenagers do outgrow the worst stages, there are some details that cling into at least their 20's, as my daughters have proven.

Oh yeah - did I tell you, I now have both daughters living with me? Along with my 7-month-old granddaughter? In a one-bedroom apartment? Daughter with baby had to move when she discovered her roommate stealing from her (lease was in roomie's name). Oldest daughter broke up with boyfriend and lost job all in a matter of days. So now I'm back to fighting for computer time or TV time in my own home. Again.

Oh, the horrors!

Before - After

In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )