Radiogurl a la Carte

Sunday, Jun. 20, 2004
Future_Insomniac

It's 4:30AM and I'm awake. Amazing how a sick baby can keep the whole house up all night several nights straight.

My granddaughter has been here for a few days and hasn't been sleeping well, but tonight her temperature soared. We were trying to decide if we should take her to the ER when we discovered it's because she is cutting FOUR molars simultaneously. It took paying exhorbidant, 24-hour-convenience-store prices, but by getting a package of Ora-jel and a bottle of baby ibuprofin, she was a whole different child within just a few minutes. Went from lethargic and burning up to just slightly warm but begging for something to eat and a bottle. (She's a little over a year old.)

Once we fed her and gave her a bottle she was out like a light. You'd have thought I'd have checked her for that sooner but noooo... Four kids later at least the brain DID finally kick in. We'd been giving her Tylenol but she apparently inherited my family chemistry - to wit, the stuff's a waste of money for all the good it does.

Got all the laundry done yesterday afternoon, got some cleaning done, and not a heck of a lot more. I'm supposed to go to church today but don't know if I'll even attempt it. I know I'm needed as a pianist but kind of hard to play when I'm nodding off.

But guess I should try.

The grandbaby and her mommy are going back home tomorrow - while I was glad they got to come up here for a few days, I'll also be glad to have my home back. To not have a mess when I walk in every day, to not have to fight for computer time, to be able to go to bed without competiting for my bedroom, and to not be woken several times a night with a crying baby... This week brought back a LOT of memories!!! I was reminded why it's better to be a grandmother than a mother when it comes to young children, no matter how much you love them.

Once the kids leave tomorrow I have to clean off my desk. While it doesn't have to be immaculate, I'd like to have at least enough clear space to work, and that's not the case now. I also want to get rid of all the soft drink cans that accumulate over the course of the day. I drink very few soft drinks myself - I buy a 12-pack and it lasts me a month or more - but the kids gulp it down like water. And the youngest seems to think that my desk is where the empty cans should be left. And that doesn't count her leaving my cordless phone wherever she feels like it, scattering her stuff all over my bedroom and bathroom, etc.

I had forgotten how nice it was to clean things up and have them STAY clean for a while. Amazing how that works.

Pulled on a pair of jeans earlier today and remember thinking they felt awfully loose just since a few days ago. Stepped onto the bathroom scales and looks like the weight loss has increased again. While it's not quite comparable to the first two weeks on this diet, it's not far from it. Lost ten pounds in about a week and a half. I cheated one night, had a burger because I was simply too exahausted to cook, but otherwise haven't broken the diet in a few days, nor even eaten all that I was allowed to eat. It was partly recovering from being sick, I guess, but also I just don't miss the stuff I'm not supposed to eat. I like what I'm allowed and I like losing the weight even more. I'm now a size smaller than my youngest daughter in some things and the same size as she is in others.

Still a long way from my target weight but at least I know it's attainable now. If I would get off my duff and exercise regularly I'd be getting there even sooner, but between work and the flu and having the kids here all week, I had a definite setback on that end of things.

I've got to turn in for the night, though, before it gets any later. In theory I should try and get some sleep. This is precisely the kind of week that sets me up for insomnia. I finally get back into some kind of regular sleep pattern, then get something that kicks me to late nights, night after night for several nights straight, and voilá! - insomnia for a month after.

Before - After

In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )