Radiogurl a la Carte

2004-03-01
Sleep Surfing

I am screwing around at work.

Not literally, of course. That might entail smiling and we all know that isn't permitted except when on the air. And since 99% of what I do is behind the scenes, I rarely smile. I think I smiled once and it frightened my children.

At the moment I'm running virus-killer programs as a precautionary measure, since 00, in her infinite wisdom, managed last night to acquire a record-breaking 61 viruses on my home computer - and since my home computer is connected to our virtual private network at work, I'm not taking any chances.

00 is fortunately a sharp kid when it comes to computers, despite the fact that she got hit with the virus attack. I go to her for questions on hardware issues that aren't proprietary stuff. She had the virus batallion mowed down and buried in record time last night. I was mad at first but I also know that viruses tend to get everyone now and again, even the people who know better.

Unfortunately the combo of virus invaders, a killer week last week (sans any real break over the weekend) and a handful of other details meant that I got about zero sleep over the past few nights.

When my alarm clock went off this morning I realized my boss had a choice. I could doze off sitting through another boring rounds of arraignments at the courthouse, 99% of which are for somebody busted for pot; or I could stay in the office and tackle the computers again, in hopes of making progress against the random crash problems with our broadcast software.

There was also the matter of running a just-to-be-sure virus check, even though I'm reasonably confident it'll be all clear. I do love a Linux Smoothwall router. While not infallible, it will go a long ways toward blocking the spread of viruses through the network.

Here I am, therefore, sitting at the computer and pretending to be awake. I have perfected the art of sleeping with eyes open and typing and installing driver updates, etc. I perfected it while doing morning-drive news a few years ago. When you arrive at 4AM, and hit the airwaves shortly after, you'd better damned well be able to read in your sleep.

However, no one in their right mind wakes me early when I don't have to wake up for work or a family emergency. Case in point:

True story - there's a police report that backs it up. Last summer, August 1st to be exact, a man broke into my apartment. While my daughter was living with me at the time, she was in Phoenix for the weekend so I was there alone. I woke up around 5am, give or take, in semi-darkness, to the touch of a hand caressing my thigh and to see this guy standing over me. It was too dark to see his face or any features other than short dark hair.

If you've ever watched television, you know that the perfectly sane reaction for a woman waking to that would be to scream at the top of her lungs and panic, and then be subjected to some kind of attack.

I make a lousy woman, I guess. Instead of panicking, I got pissed. Royally so. I yelled, all right. I yelled at him, and told him in no uncertain terms to get OUT. I guess all of those years of being a mom paid off - when I tell someone to do something, they do it. Whoever he was, he got out, and in a hurry. I was right behind him, though I don't know what I'd have done if he'd turned around to come back after me. I think I was mad enough to do something stupid. NOBODY wakes me up at 5AM when I don't have to get up!

I did call the police after the fact, and the officers came in to take a report. They were incredulous when I told them what had happened. One of the guys' eyes were watering as I saw him try valiantly to keep from laughing. I had to give him credit - and permission to guffaw. It was pretty ludicrous, you have to admit.

Yeah, I'm aware I was incredibly lucky. Makes me uncomfortably aware of the old saying about God protecting children and fools. And I know I'm not a child. I do count my lucky stars. But I guess my history caught up with me, because I'm just too tired and too pissed off at the idiots to let them push me around any more.

I'm finally moving, by the way. Never could find a place to buy but am renting a place that's about four times the space and in much better condition. Also not an apartment, so no neighbors downstairs/upstairs or just on the other side of a wall.

00 is a neat freak to extremes, which is just fine by me. I pay her room and board and pay her a small stipend every month and I virtually never do housework any more. She does all the laundry, vacuuming, makes the beds, etc. Given my schedule, that's a gosend and a half.

She's going to earn her way this month especially, because she gets to pack. And she's chomping at the bit to do it, too, because she knows she'll have her own bedroom AND we'll have a dishwasher.

Enough rambling for the moment. I've got to get back and see if anyone has answered my computer questions, and hope I don't implode when they again tell me to disconnect from the network...

Before - After

In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )