Radiogurl a la Carte

Wednesday, Feb. 21, 2007
Carb Overload and Rambling

I left all the comments on my previous entry, including that I considered deleting. Suffice to say that it confirmed we're right to pack it on out of here. Can't blame Rosie for becoming frustrated, and if the shoe was on the other foot and it was my child, I'd probably react the same way.

I still won't say a word against Rosie, by the way, because she's been nothing but generous to us. She saved our butts and we both know it. We've been here six months now. That's a whole heck of a lot longer than any non-family should impose, under any circumstances.

MC and I have been packing today. Or more accurately, MC has been packing pretty much all day. With me it was more hit-and-miss. I made the mistake of eating a couple of chocolate cookies after a meal, and they predictably made me ill again. As a result I ended up sitting on my butt for a good hour while MC kept working. Hypoglycemia sucks, and in my case it's definitely gotten worse over the past few months.

I need to send out some more resumes and get a job, while trying to figure out how to cover six bases on five cents in the interim. The truck license expires this month, on top of everything else.

I am trying to keep a positive outlook nonetheless. That's not to say that there haven't been times in the past that the proverbial rug was pulled from under me. If that happens, so be it - but I'm at least giving it my best shot at believing everything will work out. Somehow.

My dad called a few days ago. I can't recall exactly when, probably because I try to put ugly memories out of my mind. He periodically calls or emails to complain that I haven't talked to him in a while.

Well DUH.

Anyway, I finally told him that MC and I got married, albeit reluctantly.

Lest anyone condemn me for not telling my own father, I should point out that Daddy Dearest is a real prize winner. The kindest thing God ever did for me in this lifetime was sending my dad to Texas to retire. Believe me, I'm not alone in the sentiment. Neither my brother nor my sister want anything to do with him, either. Ditto for the grandkids. This man personifies the qualities of selfishness and cruelty and I barely tolerate him even at a distance. I don't yell when he calls, or anything like that; but any contact is kept mighty short, since it generally only consists of his complaints, anyway.

This disjointed entry comes to you courtesy of sleep deprivation and too much on my mind. But given that it's now ungodly o'clock in the past-midnight, I'm calling it a night and hoping that tomorrow I can regain some semblance of intellect.

Before - After

In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )