Radiogurl a la Carte

Wednesday, Dec. 15, 2004
Kiss My Ass Award

My rant mode hasn't really changed, merely shifted gears. It seems like the holidays bring out the extremes of good and bad. I think of it as the Santa effect: if you're out to curry favor with the Big Guy, you're on your best behavior and living an illustration of how to be. If you've already completely screwed up your chances at a nice toy, you're out to earn every lump of coal in your stalking.

Case in point:

I work for a radio station that uses the moniker of "Kiss FM." Lest you go running in glee for your phone directory (though I honestly don't worry if you do,) there are something on the order of 450 "Kiss FM" radio stations out there now. Supposedly there's no more than one per market area, and we licensed ours for the whole state. Someone still opened another Kiss FM in Phoenix, but I digress.

Every year about this time, somebody local does something so bone-headed that we designate them the recipients of the "Kiss My Ass" award. This isn't the murderers and child molesters, the folks who perpetrate heinous and sickening crimes on innocents. This is for the idiot/jerk factor, which apparently makes up a small but consistent portion of the population. Most of the time, politicians take the award, hands-... er, cheeks-down. There can be crimes involved, even potentially crimes involving serious money, just not physical injury. Last year the award was a tie, going to two local businesses that locked their doors immediately before Christmas, disappearing and leaving their employees not only out of work, but without a paycheck for the work that they DID perform.

Today I'm nominating a dipstick who walked into a local convenience store and stole a pickle jar.

Now, if it was a pickle jar full of pickles it wouldn't warrant a Kiss My Ass award. No, this guy swiped a gallon-sized glass pickle jar that was being used for donations for a local family in need. I didn't get the specifics what the jar was out for, but around here, it generally means collections to help families after a death or in the event of a serious illness (cancer is the most common reason.) Thing is, these jars rarely have more than $15 in them. So this dingbat walked into a store at 4am and stole $15 at most, money that was earmarked for somebody who needed it.

Not the end of the world, obviously, but c'mon... Was it really worth it to steal such a small amount of money from a family in need?

Sometimes you just wanna bop somebody on the head and ask them, "What were you THINKING???"

Before - After

In the grander scheme of things, no soul can truly be replaced. Each one of us has a place in the universal tapestry. We each contribute our own color and texture. When one thread is snipped too soon, it distorts all the threads around it. Other lives can unravel and tear. If the wrong thread is ripped away, the whole fabric of life becomes dangerously fragile.
- LeiLani, aka Radiogurl aka Bright Opal (1957 - )